You’re about to walk into your office Christmas party. You know all these people, but you’re still worried you’re going to be the “biggest, fattest, and ugliest” person in the room. After all, you tell yourself this all the time, so why wouldn’t you be?

Your family is surrounding the table, ready to have a Christmas lunch. The food looks delicious but you know that your Aunt Carol is going to be judging you for how much you eat. You know you’re going to be feeling guilty and like you have to starve yourself and/or exercise excessively to burn all this off.

If you haven’t had these exact thoughts, chances are, you have had similar ones. We all tell ourselves we are going to be kinder to ourselves, or that if I just lost 10kg I wouldn’t feel this way anymore. Every time though, that inner Regina George still comes out & tells us how crap we are.

So what can we do about it? What are some actual steps you can take to feel better about yourself in these situations? Don’t worry – I got you, girl! See my 5 actionable steps for feeling more confident over the holidays!

1. Prepare Ahead for Negative Thoughts

We all know what our go-to insecurities are when it comes to our body/eating habits, so we need to plan ahead to be able to switch those thoughts.

Action Step: On a piece of paper or in the notes on your phone, write down your insecurities. {Don’t worry, it gets more positive I promise!)

2. Address and Correct Your Insecurities

A great way to combat the negative thought spiral is to have positive things ready to combat those negative thoughts. E.g. If we are worried about people judging us for what we eat, we can remind ourselves that we deserve to nourish our bodies. That all food nourishes us in some way, physically or mentally.

Action Step: Come up with positive corrections for your insecurities – write them down. 

3. Practice your Corrections Anytime they Come Up

Your go-to right now is to spiral into all the things you hate about yourself as soon as one negative thought comes up. This doesn’t just happen at special events, it happens every day. Practicing will help make that mindset shift easier to do over the holidays (and forever!). We are creating new pathways in your brain!

Action Step: Every time a negative thought comes up, switch it to your correction. Use your notes if needed & feel free to keep adding thoughts and corrections. 

4. Practice Gratitude and Appreciation

Your body is amazing and you need to start appreciating that. You’re eating an amazing dinner roll, it’s buttery and AMAZING and instead of appreciating how flipping delicious it is, you’re thinking about how you’re going to burn it off.

What about the poor celiac’s that can’t eat a delightful, gluten-filled dinner roll? What about how amazing it is that your taste buds are giving you the opportunity to taste so many different flavour? What about how your body can use that delicious dinner roll for energy later to keep you alive?

Appreciating what you have and what your body can do helps switch our focus from our body only being worthy due to its appearance, to being amazing for its function!

Action Step: For your negative thoughts, think of a bodily function that can apply & why you appreciate that function. OR what it would be like if you couldn’t have the foods that make you feel guilty. 

5. Start Filling Your Feed with Positivity!

We have no control over who is cast in movies and TV shows (unless you’re a casting agent in which case, go you and please help promote more body diversity, thanks!) but we do have control of who shows up in our social media feeds. It’s time to fill your feed with body diversity. This will help you to love, accept and grow accustomed to seeing all different bodies, which in turn, will help you love and accept your own.

Action Step: Unfollow anyone who makes you have negative thoughts about your body/eating/exercise habits & head over to @activelyyou_ on insta and check out the FMF (Fill my Feed) highlight to see some AMAZING people you can follow!

So there are 5 ACTIONABLE steps to help you battle your inner mean girl, AND WIN! There is so much more to learn to love, move and nourish your body in a healthy and balanced way but these steps will set you on the right path, and with implementation – you’ll notice a real difference!

Brittany Frino

Actively You – Founder